I am super dumb and thought that it would be a good idea to listen to my summer playlist. From last summer, specifically. Last summer was kind of painful for me, although for no one reason in particular. It’s just that, the summer after high school and before college is supposed to be like the best time ever, and for me it turned out to be quite possibly the worst time ever. It got off to kind of a bad start, with one of my classmates dying right before graduation, and then it just never really got better. There was the whole friends issue and the mike issue and, well, everything was an issue. And these songs that I’m listening to now, they were the soundtrack to one of the most uncomfortable and unsatisfying summers in my memory. When I hear the songs, I feel just as broken as I did in August. It’s almost as if the music somehow pervades my body, traveling through my ears down to my heart, and slowly and painfully tears apart the cracks in its outer shell that I’ve spent all winter to keep from re-opening.

Which really sucks because I can’t even listen to Sweet Disposition anymore without actually wanting to vomit.